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Confidential, non-judgemental support for pornography use that feels out of control, distressing, or difficult to change — with a Melbourne-based registered psychologist. Sessions online, weekday mornings AEST.
Alicia Shevlin is a registered psychologist in Melbourne offering telehealth therapy for adults across Australia experiencing distress related to pornography use, compulsive sexual behaviour patterns, and difficulties with sexual self-regulation.
Many people search for terms such as “pornography addiction psychologist,” “porn addiction help,” or “compulsive pornography use therapy” when they are experiencing a sense of loss of control, distress, or conflict about their pornography use.
While these terms are commonly used, Alicia does not treat these experiences as an addiction disorder per se. Instead, she is interested in the meaning you make of your pornography use, as well as the psychological and relational factors that may underlie these patterns and the distress they create.
People who seek therapy in this area often describe feeling unable to control their pornography use, experiencing cycles of engagement followed by guilt or shame, or noticing impacts on intimacy, work, relationships, or self-esteem. Others describe using pornography in ways that feel tied to stress, anxiety, loneliness, shame or emotional overwhelm.
Alicia works with these experiences as meaningful psychological patterns, rather than focusing on the behaviour in isolation. The emphasis is on understanding what the behaviour represents in the context of a person’s emotional life, relationships, and history.
Pornography use can start to feel out of control in different ways. You might recognise some of the following:
For some people, pornography use may have become a way of managing emotions, coping with stress, or meeting needs that are difficult to put into words. This can help explain why simply trying to stop may not address the underlying pattern. Understanding what the pornography use is doing for you, and what may be driving it, can be a more useful place to start.
You might describe your pornography use as an addiction, or you might not. You may simply know that your use feels difficult to control, that you’ve tried to change it, or that it’s causing distress in your life.
You don’t need to work out the right label before seeking help. Therapy focuses on understanding the pattern itself, including what keeps you coming back to pornography, what role it plays in your life, and what may be making it difficult to change.
Alicia’s focus is on your individual experience of distress, repetition, conflict, and meaning around your sexual behaviour, rather than on applying a particular diagnostic label. The aim is to understand what’s happening for you and what you want to be different.
Sometimes the concern isn’t how much pornography you watch, but the kinds of content you’re drawn to. You might feel confused, ashamed, or distressed about particular fantasies, fetishes, or interests, or wonder what they mean about you.
Therapy can provide a space to explore these concerns without judgement. The focus is not on assuming that a particular sexual interest is a problem, but on understanding what it means to you, how you feel about it, and whether it is causing distress or conflict with your values or relationships.
Alicia’s work is informed by psychodynamic and relational perspectives. Therapy in this area often involves exploring:
The aim is to develop deeper insight into the patterns of experience that shape behaviour, rather than focusing solely on behaviour change. If you have tried abstinence-based approaches, 12-step programs, or movements such as “NoFap” and found that they have not addressed the underlying issue, a depth-oriented therapeutic approach may offer a more helpful path forward.
This exploratory, understanding-based way of working is the core of Alicia’s practice.
Alicia has published research exploring how individuals who self-identify as experiencing pornography addiction make sense of their experiences.
Her research highlights that self-labelling can sometimes help people articulate distress and reduce shame, while also shaping how they understand their difficulties in ways that may limit more nuanced self-understanding. These findings inform her clinical approach, which prioritises making meaning of your use of pornography in the broader context of your life, rather than focusing on fixed diagnostic labels.
Reference: Shevlin, A., & Ivey, G. (2024). The discursive construction of self-diagnosed pornography addiction. Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, 33(1), 86–98.
Pornography use that feels difficult to control is often connected to other parts of your emotional or relational life. This might include anxiety, depression, trauma, loneliness, low self-worth, relationship difficulties, or difficulty managing overwhelming feelings. For some people, pornography becomes a way of coping with experiences that are difficult to deal with directly.
This is why therapy looks beyond the behaviour itself to understand what may be maintaining the pattern. Rather than focusing only on stopping or reducing pornography use, psychodynamic therapy explores what the behaviour may be doing for you and what may be making it difficult to change.
This can include exploring what the use helps you avoid or manage, where these patterns may have come from, and what they have come to mean in your life. Depending on what emerges, this may connect with anxiety, trauma, or relationship challenges.
Pornography use can affect relationships and intimacy in different ways. It may affect trust, connection, your sex life, or how you feel about yourself as a partner. This is individual work focused on your own experience and patterns, rather than couples therapy or counselling for anyone else. Understanding your own part in what’s happening can sometimes change how you relate to yourself and others.
Where relationship concerns would benefit from couples therapy alongside individual work, Alicia can discuss this with you and, where appropriate, recommend a suitable couples therapist.
Read more about relationship challenges.
Shame can also become part of the pattern. It can make pornography use harder to talk about, contribute to secrecy, and leave you feeling increasingly disconnected from others. Being able to talk about these experiences openly with someone who won’t judge you can make it possible to understand the pattern more clearly and begin to change it.
Therapy may be helpful if your pornography use feels:
You don’t need to have a particular label for your experience before seeking help. Therapy can provide a space to understand what is happening and what you want to change.
A free 15-minute phone call is a chance to discuss whether therapy might be right for you.
Alicia provides a confidential and non-judgemental therapeutic space to explore these concerns. The focus is on understanding emotional and relational patterns, reducing distress, and supporting greater psychological insight and integration.
Alicia (she/her) is a registered psychologist based in Melbourne. She completed a Master of Applied Psychology (Clinical Psychology) at Victoria University and provides telehealth psychotherapy to adults across Australia. Her therapeutic work is primarily grounded in psychodynamic psychotherapy. Training at Victoria University emphasised an integrative approach that extended beyond cognitive behavioural therapy, incorporating psychodynamic thinking alongside other therapeutic modalities. This foundation continues to shape Alicia’s clinical work, supporting an approach that helps people develop a deeper understanding of themselves, their relationships, and their broader life experiences.
Pornography addiction is an area Alicia has engaged with as a researcher as well as a clinician: she is published in the Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, with peer-reviewed work on how people understand pornography use and self-diagnosed “addiction.”
AHPRA registration: PSY0002275993
Member: Australian Psychological Society
Alicia works with individuals and does not provide couples therapy. Sessions are for therapeutic support and are not conducted for medico-legal purposes such as court reports.
Alicia is Melbourne-based and works entirely via telehealth, with sessions held over Zoom.
For this concern in particular, telehealth removes a barrier that stops many people ever reaching out. When what you’re bringing is this private and this bound up with shame, the prospect of sitting in a clinic waiting room, facing a receptionist, and then talking about it in person can be enough to keep you from booking at all. Attending from your own space — private, familiar, with the door closed — makes speaking openly considerably easier.
Practically, you’ll need a private space where you won’t be overheard, a stable internet connection, and a device with a camera. Headphones help and matter more than usual for privacy here.
Appointments are available on weekday mornings only, scheduled in Australian Eastern Standard Time (or AEDT during Victorian daylight saving), both before and after 9:00 am AEST.
Service area: Because of the session times, therapy for pornography use with Alicia is typically most suitable for people in Victoria, New South Wales, Queensland, South Australia, the ACT and the Northern Territory.
There’s no fixed amount or frequency that makes pornography use a problem — what matters is its effect on you. It may be worth seeking support if your use feels out of control, conflicts with your values, is affecting your relationships or well-being, is bound up with shame, or if you’ve tried to change it and haven’t been able to. The distress and the sense of being stuck are what count, not a number.
No. Alicia’s approach is exploratory and understanding-based rather than a 12-step or abstinence-enforcement programme. Rather than focusing on streaks, rules, or willpower, therapy explores what’s driving the use and what it’s connected to. Which, for many people, is what makes change sustainable in a way that rule-based approaches, or movements like “NoFap,” on their own haven’t been.
Questions about medication are best discussed with your GP or psychiatrist, who can assess your individual circumstances and advise on treatment options. As a psychologist, Alicia does not prescribe medication but can work alongside your other treating professionals where appropriate.
Yes. As a registered psychologist, Alicia is bound by professional and legal confidentiality obligations — what you discuss stays in session, and records are kept securely. As with all psychological practice in Australia, there are limited exceptions where disclosure may be required (such as a serious risk to safety), and these are explained as part of informed consent before therapy begins.
Yes. Alicia works with people of all genders, sexual orientations, and sex characteristics, including intersex, transgender, and gender-diverse people. Concerns about pornography use can arise across all identities and sexualities. You can talk about these concerns openly and without judgement, whatever your background or identity.
It varies depending on what’s driving the use and what it’s connected to. Because these patterns are often bound up with longstanding emotional or relational factors, Alicia’s psychodynamic approach is generally suited to medium- to long-term work, with pace discussed throughout. Under a Mental Health Treatment Plan, Medicare rebates are available for up to 10 individual sessions per calendar year.
No to both. You can book directly with Alicia without a referral or a Mental Health Treatment Plan, and you don’t need a diagnosis to begin. A referral from your GP or psychiatrist is only needed if you want to claim a Medicare rebate. Without one, sessions are privately billed. See current session fees.
Yes. All of Alicia’s sessions are delivered via telehealth over Zoom, which suits this concern particularly well — the privacy of attending from your own space removes a barrier that stops many people seeking help. She works with adults across Australia, subject to the weekday-morning AEST session times.
Often, yes — on trust, intimacy, connection, or how you feel about yourself as a partner. This is individual work focused on your own experience and patterns rather than couples therapy, but understanding your own part in what’s happening can shift how you relate.
It can. For some people, pornography becomes a way of managing stress, anxiety, loneliness, boredom, or difficult feelings. Exploring the emotional role pornography use may play can be an important part of understanding why a pattern has developed and what may help it change.
Concerns about pornography use can be difficult to talk about, particularly when shame is involved. Therapy provides a private, non-judgemental space to talk openly about your experiences and understand them in more depth.
A free 15-minute phone call is a chance to discuss whether therapy might be right for you.
The information below outlines what therapy involves, how telehealth sessions work, and practical details regarding fees and Medicare rebates.
Learn about how a range of mental health issues can be treated with psychodynamic therapy.
Access therapy without leaving home. Learn what to expect from beginning telehealth therapy.
Medicare rebates available for eligible patients. A referral from your GP or psychiatrist is required.